if i eat this i will just have to throw it up later.....




hello dilemma.


guess ill just have to munch on Valium, diet coke and cigarettes.


love life.


summer diet.


way of life?

its not that im against marriage. its just that im for logic.

alll night long until we both bleed.

boys. should. be easy.

im on an andre legacy kick.
seriously.
hes amazing.
i just want something new from his beautiful self.
but i wanted to blog.
because i just want to say.
you beautiful people.
boys. should. be easy.
life is so hard.
so hard. you have to go to school you have to work you have so much responsibility.
the easiest. thing. ever. should be boys. they should love you. you shouldnt have to think about then you shouldnt have to worry about them, they should be like drugs. they should be easy. not something you have to work for or make an effort to get. they should be so fucking easy.
thats the point.
they are like drinking.
and drugs,
they should be easy and a tad natural. you shouldnt have to think at all.
they should pursue you. and you should never have to work for it. okay. fact
the boys should be easy.
lifes too hard as it is.

road dome

please. beautiful people. tell me your remember your first time. 
i was beyond wrecked for mine so i dont really. 
i just mostly remember thinking holy fuck this shit hurts and i passed out three times.
out cold. down for the count. looking back i wonder wtf is wrong with the guy who took my virginity. then i remember  he was a boy in high school. of course hes going to go for it. thats like they're specialty. 
but anyway. if your still a virgin heres a few tips that could help make the experience less of a shit show.
1. dont pretend to know what your doing. 
2. dont take copious amounts of oxy chased with weed.
3. dont be sober. thats just so much more painful and memorable.
4. dont pretend its special.... its not. at all. its just sex. virgin or not.
5. dont day drink prior..... the wetter the better. and being really dehydrated does not soothe the pain of a ripped vagina. 
6. lube cant hurt-it can only help.
7. use a condom.
8. smoke after
9. weed plus sex is great.
10. make sure the guys hot..... chances are youll vaguely remeber him for years to come. 
11. do it somewhere comfortable where you can make noise
12. foreplay is a virgin must. cannot stress enough the importance of being wet. 
i was dry as a bone because i couldnt feel anything with all the oxy in my system. and my god. 
my hair practically stood up and i screeched.
it was horrible. 
13. be skinny. you want to look hot.
14. dont try ten million new positions. take it easy. you have your whole life for reverse cowboy.
15. music!!! have something playing. the sounds are pretty horrifying for the first time.
16. there will be blood. if your an athlete like me then not much. but you could bleed a teensy bit. 
17. be shaved. 
18. experienced guys are the way to go. 
19. i fucked someone else after my vag recovered from losing my virginity... probaly three days.
it was actually genius. i didnt get attached at all. 
20. keep doing it till its fun.
21. do remeber its suppose to be fun and it will be. 
the second that vag is torn feel free to get wild. 
just be careful.
you are your own worst enemy in these situations.
practice makes purrfect my darlings.
and if you arent fucking yet.
its time to start. 
fuck waiting for the perfect man.
do it when your readyyy 
cos it gets realllyyy fun :)

funny. funny.