• Thursday

  
  

  • (310):
    
    When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
    
    (414):
    
    I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
    
    
    (251):
    
    Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
    
    
    (651):
    
    She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
• 
  

  Thursday

  
  

  • (330):
    
    She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
• 
  

  Thursday

  
  

  • (978):
    
    He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
• 
  

  Thursday

  
  

  • (262):
    
    put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone